Over the last 10 years, I had experienced many emotions. I was willing to do what I needed to grow and heal. I found myself unhappy in my marriage. So, I sought out therapy and then medication.
As I became stronger in therapy I no longer wanted or felt the need for medication. I was convinced that I could work through the energy myself and heal what I needed to heal in order to live a life of happiness.
I relied heavily on my USM training in Spiritual Psychology. In Spiritual Psychology, they say, “You have earned the right to deal with this challenge.” I really liked that idea and I do my best to use it as often as I can.
So, here’s what happened:
15 years ago - I was experiencing depression. it was caused by the pressures of work, home and raising children.
3 years ago (after I was separated): I worked through the depression and then FEAR showed up. And then recently I saw it was all anchored in Stress. The years of business, winning and losing,...
One morning I woke up at 4:15 curious why I disconnect from reality and responsibility.
Why I don’t address simple issues in my life.
I got calmly curious and asked myself: How come I keep avoiding simple, doable tasks in my life?
Through meditation I saw the pain I experienced as a result of a painful. Relationship when I was younger and how I linked and stacked experiences after that to create false belief patterns. I saw where I enforced a negative outcome and insured that outcome by avoiding the very simple tasks and needs of my business and relationships to guarantee failure. I was re-attracting the pain from my childhood. I saw by avoiding simple actions in my life I created and insured the feeling of disappointment and sadness.
It got so bad that a few years ago I started to think I was losing my ability to think critically and I started to give up on that too, again guaranteeing my failure, disappointment and sadness.
Through Meditation and Gratitude Journaling I can...
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